Life can seem unbearable at times, but don't let it keep you down. Meditate on God's goodness, talk to Him, and know that He hears you. When life knocks you to your knees, you're in a good position to pray.
Monday, August 29, 2005
Sleepy Head
I've noticed that I haven't been doing my usual affairs whenever I go online, like bloghopping and blogging, and I know I need not say that anymore. It's very obvious I have ignored the blogging world for such long time or several times now, but it doesn't really mean I've lost my interest. It's just that I usually find myself now sleepy most of the time. This really annoys me because I feel sleepy mostly at the wrong places and at the wrong time. I would really appreciate it if I'd fall asleep the moment my head touches my pillow, after I am done with my "planned" routines before going to sleep. but it's the other way around. I find it hard to get sleep once I'm already lying down in my bed because I'm being stormed with a lot of thoughts or maybe it's just that my eyes won't close. I don't really know. Maybe the fact that i sleep at the time of the day where people are supposed to be awake also adds to the agony. And then comes the time I need to prepare for work, where all people in the house are already getting ready for sleep. It's really so hard to have a graveyard work shift. Ah, the things a person would do just to earn money!
I am not like this before, and it's really ironic that I would be feeling sleepy when all you can think is I should've already adjusted and got used to this kind of waking and sleeping pattern. I should've gotten used to this kind of lifestyle to think that I have been like this for (exactly) 2 years already. Or maybe this is just an effect of a medicine I'm taking, but I don't think I'm taking anything this time. Anyways, I am actually taking advantage of this some time (dahil nga maling oras at lugar ako inaantok), because I used to have sleepless "days" before and it just adds to the stress I get from the pressures of life. To me, sleep is a luxury I can't afford all the time, that's why I grab every opportunity to get some.
It just saddens me that I get to ignore and take for granted the things that I enjoy doing whenever I go online. Blogging, blog hopping, tagging on tagboards, and commenting. Of course I can't comment if I don't read the posts. I have also missed the fun of reading free ebooks online. Well, I guess I would have to choose something that's better for me first this time because it'd not really be good if my health would suffer just because I am feeding my insatiable thirst (read: addiction) for the internet and everything in it. And besides, I only get to do all of these when I'm at work and I am using company resources and it's not really good to do that but it's my way of keeping myself up and wide awake so I should not take my work for granted as well. I am not being payed to blog and surf the net.
Perhaps once I gain enough strength to cope up with such addiction (hehehe =D), I would go back to my old routine, but I'll get it organized by then so as to fit it with my schedule without having my sleep suffer, and some other more important things to do. I have to be responsible for my every action.
Hala.. antagal na ko na t-in-ag ni arn for these questions pero ngayon ko lang nasagutan. Pero sabi nga, better late than never. ^_^
Here are some things that'll help you to have at least a little idea about me. These are arranged in no particular order.
Seven things that scare me... 1. a situation where you'll just beg to die but you're still alive. 2. hell 3. the unseen (I think fear is the more appropriate word for what I feel on these things) 4. cancer, or any painful disease 5. flying cockroach (yuck) 6. centipede (alupihan) 7. crazy/wild people (or even animals)
Seven things I like most 1. books (the Bible, novels, poetry, computer books.. hehe, whatta geek!) 2. the internet 3. gadgets 4. nature at its peaceful state 5. computer 6. music 7. pictures
Seven important things in my room (you mean "our" room... I share room with my sisters) 1. air cooler 2. mirror 3. blanket 4. books 5. trash can 6. wall clock 7. gameboy
Seven random facts about me... 1. I'm petite 2. I am fascinated with magical creatures and things 3. I'm attracted to geeks 4. I don't mind walking long distances 5. I'm a Christian 6. I'm meticulous (daw) 7. I look like chinese
Seven things I plan to do before I die... 1. live a life that's pleasing to God as much as possible 2. Let all the people I love know that I love them 3. make sure that I forgive and I am forgiven 4. probably have my own family 5. have my own house 6. have my own car 7. wala na ko maisip =P
Seven things that I CAN do... 1. I can flip my tongue top-side down 2. I can play the guitar 3. play chess 4. play a flute recorder 5. sing a tune 6. multitask (on certain things) 7. I can raise either left or right brows
Seven things that I CAN'T do... 1. drive 2. swim 3. sleep without a blanket 4. write with my left hand 5. sing BEAM toothpaste song with a sad face and with people around trying to make me laugh 6. drink coffee without creamer (unless I don't have a choice) 7. look at my crush straight in the eye
Seven things that attract me to the opposite sex (on first encounters) 1. eyes 2. smile 3. a gentleman 4. neat 5. nice-smelling (hmmm.. amoy baby cologne! hehehe) 6. humor; doesn't have a hard time making people laugh 7. lips
Seven things that I say the most... 1. anak ng tinapay... (pangit noh? =P) 2. sows 3. nyeh 4. weh 5. ano-no? 6. okidoks 7. ano ba yan
Seven celebrity crushes... 1. si Harry Potter =D 2. Christopher Reeves when he was the Superman 3. Chris Evans as the Human Torch in Fantastic Four 4. Orlando Bloom as Legolas 5. Brendan Fraser 6. Keanu Reeves 7. yung guitarist/vocalist ng Cueshe (di ko sya kilala)
Seven people I want to tag... 1. kahit 2. sino 3. na lang 4. gusto. 5. basta 6. chcheck ko 7. blogs nyo ;-)
Alam nyo bang halos 7 days in the making yan??? (weh.. OA si goldi). Hehehe.. halos din. Napakadami naman kasi ng 7 eh. Anyway, I'm glad I finished it. Now it's your turn! I'll be checkin' around na lng kung sino sumagot. ;-)
Oh my... kaya pala it's been days that the mood pics are only showing a red "x" in a box is because the unkymoods website is nowhere to be found. What happened kaya? This free moods for you website service has done a great part in putting some life in my blog and now, it's gone???
Okay. I've been tagged by already two people in my "A" - list of blog friends (Arnold, and Arglene) to answer these questions so, here's mine. Napilitan tuloy akong mag-post, hehehe. =D
Thanks to the two of you. Nagkaroon ako ng ipo-post. =P
1. What are the things you enjoy doing even when there's no one around you?
Think and talk to myself. And this one I really do alone talaga kasi kung may people around, di hindi na sarili ko kakausapin ko =P. I usually find myself pondering on something whenever I am alone and if it's something that raises question in my mind or something I just realized, I sometimes blurt out to myself the question or I'll just agree loudly. Just plainly talking "with" myself. Kasi I ask the question, and then when I've thought of the answer, I'll answer loudly. Weird noh. =P Mag-isa lang naman ako eh. Basically I was just thinking out loud.
Read. Who wants to be disturbed when reading? Though I don't mind having people around while I'm reading, It'd be better if I do it alone, specially if you're reading a very good book diba. I don't really welcome interruptions when I'm reading, but it doesn't mean I'm rude. Disappointed nga lang.
Listen to music. I tend to think and ponder a lot when I listen to a song, specially if it's something I can relate to.
Prayer and quite time or devotion. I'd like to have my time alone with God all ours. And given a choice and a chance, I prefer doing it in a very quite and peaceful place. Some place that's close to nature, like the seaside, on top of a mountain or a hill, or in a park.
Write an entry in my journal. I used to do this a lot when I was in college. I used to keep a journal notebook when I still go to school because I love to write and I I still have a lot of time to do it before. Saka wala pa kaming computer nun at sobrang namamahalan ako sa pag-rent ng pc para lang mag-internet. I still do keep a journal up to these days but I don't write much in it now. As in, mas madalas ko pa ngang i-update 'tong blog (madalas pa ng lagay na yan). I miss those times though.
2. What lowers your stress/blood pressure/anxiety level?
An inspirational song or any music with a soothing sound
Siguro if I'd be given flowers? (Hehehe) Or a rocky road ice cream
An encouraging word
People who believe in me and cheer me up, or plainly people who are there for me no matter what
Crying I guess, lalo na kung medyo mabigat problema ko. It's something kasi that I'm having difficulty in doing. I only can't cry hard enough, but I'm having a hard time making myself cry. Another weirdness of me.
3. Tag five friends and ask them to post it in theirs.
ia, karla, russ, tanda and trisha. =)
*************
Bout the mood: Though it's not literally Friday, I put it because today is my Friday which means, it's my week end at work! Rest day ko na! At gusto kong manood ng Charlie and the Chocolate Factory!
I know. I've been a delinquent blogger. Having no update or post for almost a month now, I am actually distressed of what my blog has become. It almost seemed like.. dead.
What's keeping me from updating? Of course, the common excuse: busy. And also the lack of anything to post. I just can't find anything about me right now that's worth sharing, or if I have the nerve to share it. Most of the happenings in my life now are I think too personal to be published here.
I've been through a lot since my last post. It's not that I don't want to share it or write some of it here, but it's just that I don't know how I'll tell it. What I should write. I am currently having difficulties in expressing myself in writing, not as much as before. I even find myself having difficulty in expressing what I feel or what I want in words, finding myself quite most of the time now. There are even times I find myself staring blankly. Oh well. There have just been some things that have gone out of hand. I'm still fine though.
Also, I've been kept busy by our support site at work. Almost a year and a half ago, I volunteered to update and maintain it because I want to learn how to. Besides, no one else in the team wants to and can update it. We don't have enough techie people in the team and since I'm kinda geeky (I want to learn all that coding stuff), I took the initiative. Now that I've learned how to, I already find myself dragging my feet to do the task. Bad me. But of course, the responsibility is still mine. I just thought of making some major changes, particularly in the way it looks to make it appear more lively or eye candy and due to lack of resources, not to mention the surf control that prevents me from accessing some sites that offer free resources because of irritating trojans and spywares, it takes all the free time I have in the office so I end up not having the chance to blog or even bloghop. I can't even chat with my seatmates and officemates. I tend to get so engrossed with what I'm doing because I pay so much attention to details. I'm kind of OC when it comes to web design.
I miss blogging and blog hopping. And I hope to get back in this blogging thing that I used to go crazy about the soonest possible time.
I don't intend this to be my life's chronicles but I might write some of my experiences here.
Even so, everything that's written in here are either products of my excessive contemplation, or just plainly, pure boredom.
In any case, I still try to write as sensible as possible, for what I really intend to do and I hope is achieved in every writing,
is to impart or share some of the things I learn and sometimes, some struggles in life. Don't expect all seriousness in everything in here though.
In short, this blog is my outlet. My noted thoughts and reflections.
About Me
Name: Goldi
Home: Pasay City, Philippines
Birthday: June 2
Hobbies & Interests: Jesus, music, books, journals, internet, computers, tech stuff, gadgets * sound tripping, singing, playing musical instruments (I know guitar and flute recorder, I just wish I can play them well), watching movie with a tub of popcorn drizzled with melted butter (yum!), reading * observing, pondering, reflecting, learning * laughing or making people laugh (though I'm not good at it) and laugh with them, make people smile, or just listen to their stories. Minsan, trip ko lang din mang-asar =p
About Me: I'm a simple, idealistic but down-to-earth, & friendly person. Quiet most of the time, but friendly enough to have a nice talk (or even a hearty laugh) with anyone. "I myself no longer live, but Christ lives in me. So I live my life in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Galatians 2:20 NLT
Principles I live by:
"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." -Psalm 37:4
"If people talk negatively about you, live in such a way that no one will believe them."
"God is a God of happy endings. If you're not yet happy, it's not yet the end."
"It's not what we know but what we do that counts." -Our Daily Bread
"It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." -Dumbledore, Harry Potter 2
"Girls should assume that until a guy expresses interest, they're just friends." -J. Harris, Boy Meets Girl
"True love doesn't just wait; it plans." -Boy Meets Girl
"Eros will have naked bodies; friendship naked personalities." -C.S. Lewis
"Ideals are like stars; we will not succeed in touching them with our hands but by following them, as the sea faring man in the ocean, we will reach our destiny." -J. Harris, Boy Meets Girl
I've noticed that I haven't been doing my usual affairs whenever I go online, like bloghopping and blogging, and I know I need not say that anymore. It's very obvious I have ignored the blogging world for such long time or several times now, but it doesn't really mean I've lost my interest. It's just that I usually find myself now sleepy most of the time. This really annoys me because I feel sleepy mostly at the wrong places and at the wrong time. I would really appreciate it if I'd fall asleep the moment my head touches my pillow, after I am done with my "planned" routines before going to sleep. but it's the other way around. I find it hard to get sleep once I'm already lying down in my bed because I'm being stormed with a lot of thoughts or maybe it's just that my eyes won't close. I don't really know. Maybe the fact that i sleep at the time of the day where people are supposed to be awake also adds to the agony. And then comes the time I need to prepare for work, where all people in the house are already getting ready for sleep. It's really so hard to have a graveyard work shift. Ah, the things a person would do just to earn money!
Okay. I've been tagged by already two people in my "A" - list of blog friends (Arnold, and Arglene) to answer these questions so, here's mine. Napilitan tuloy akong mag-post, hehehe. =D
I know. I've been a delinquent blogger. Having no update or post for almost a month now, I am actually distressed of what my blog has become. It almost seemed like.. dead.
