.:: Goldi's Noted Thoughts ::.
Sometimes I believe all the lies
so I can do the things I should despise.
And everyday I am swayed
by whatever is on my mind.

I hear it all depends on my faith
so I'm feeling precarious.
The only problem I have with these
mysteries is they're so mysterious.

And like a consumer I've been thinkin'
if I could just get a bit more...
More than my fifteen minutes of faith,
Then I'd be secure...

My faith is like shifting sand,
changed by every wave...
My faith is like shifting sand
so I stand on grace...
Stand on grace.

I begged You for some proof
for my Thomas eyes to see.
A slithering staff, a leprous hand,
and lions resting lazily.

A glimpse of Your backside glory
on this soaked altar going ablaze.
But You know I've seen so much,
I explained it away...

My faith is like shifting sand
changed by every wave...
My faith is like shifting sand
so I stand on grace

Waters rose as my doubts reign
My sand castle faith have slipped away
I found myself standing on Your grace
It'd been there all the time

My faith is like shifting sand
changed by every wave...
My faith is like shifting sand
so I stand on grace...
Stand on grace.

Life can seem unbearable at times, but don't let it keep you down. Meditate on God's goodness, talk to Him, and know that He hears you. When life knocks you to your knees, you're in a good position to pray.
Saturday, May 21, 2005
Whaddup
I haven't found much time to blog because I am currently hooked in an online puzzle game in yahoo. hindi ko na napapansin na uuwi na pala ko at hindi ako inaantok. Ngalang, kakalaro ko nun, tinatamad na ko gumawa ng ibang bagay. I'm playing Inspector Parker's Betrapped. Sa kagustuhan kong makita yung itsura ng ibang boards sa pagtaas ng level, ayaw ko na syang tigilan. So I end up doing nothing other than that. Ni hindi ko na nga nabasa yung Digital Fortress which I am supposed to read after Angels and Demons. So ngayon, napag-isip isip ko na mag-log naman dito sa blog ko. Mukhang medyo may katagalan na since nung last kong update.

Today's my last day at work. Ibig kong sabihin, rest day ko na mamaya. Hindi na ko mag-iisip mamaya pagtulog ko na may pasok pa ko bukas at kailangan kong gumising ng maaga. Pahinga. And what I am expecting more and excited about is naka-leave ako buong week this coming week! Woohoo! Saya! Baket? Eh kasi po, pupunta lang naman kami ng Puerto Galera. :D

Sa Oriental Mondoro ang province namin pero umabot na ko sa ganitong edad eh ngayon pa lang ako makakapunta dun. Kaya nga excited ako eh. At hindi lang yun, mamasyal pa kami sa mga falls sa iba't ibang place doon. Falls hopping ba. Wahoo! Ang saya talaga! Sana makakuha ako ng maraming pics :D. Para makita nyo din.

Monday ng 4am ang meeting namin. Hindi pa ko nakakapag-impake.

May God bless our trip na lang. :)
posted by goldiqt @ 5:02 AM
(0) blessed me  
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Pray
I just want to share this inspirational quote forwarded to me by a sister in Christ through text.

Life can seem unbearable at times, but don't let it keep you down. Meditate on God's goodness, talk to Him, and know He hears you. When life knocks you to your knees, you're in a good position to pray.

If you have burdens today and you can't bear it anymore, take the opportunity of being knocked down to your knees to talk to God and tell Him you need Him. You may never know, but this is one of the most sweet sounding plea that will come from us: for the Lord to hear how much we need Him, just like how a father longs for his son's or daughter's requests.

Say at least a little prayer today, and let the Father know your needs. God loves you.

And don't forget to thank Him for the blessings! Have a blessed day.
posted by goldiqt @ 6:22 AM
(0) blessed me  
Friday, May 06, 2005
Kaya Ayokong Mag-Taxi Eh
Pang-alas 12 ng gabi ang pasok ko pero hindi naman mahirap ang sasakyan sa lugar namin, kahit anong oras meron nga eh. 24 hours ang mga pang-commute na sasakyan. Kaso kagabi, I was already running late kaya I hailed a taxi on my way to work kasi masmalaki ata ang mawawala sa kin kapag na-late ako, bawas pa sa schedule adherence rating ko yun.

Hindi ko talaga ugaling sumakay ng taxi dahil bukod sa mahal, sa dami pa ng naririnig kong balita na holdapan sa taxi at kung ano ano pang hindi maganda eh napa-paranoid na kong sumakay. Kaya lang naman ako nagta-taxi eh kapag no choice na ako at kailangang kailangan ko na. Lalo pa naman sa oras ng trabaho ko, masgugustuhin kong sumakay sa pampublikong sasakyan kung saan marami akong kasama kesa mag-isa akong nasa loob ng taxi cab. At dahil ayokong ma-late, eh di pumara na ko ng taxi. Ang unang dumaan na taxi eh yung Wallis. Eh andami kong narinig sa taxi na yun na kesyo sobrang maningil daw ang mga driver nun at ang iba daw eh nanghoholdap pa. Ewan ko lang kung totoo pero may nag-circulate na email na tungkol dun galing sa isang naging pasahero daw nila. At hindi lang daw nya isang beses na-experience yun, at hindi lang daw sya kaya naisipan nyang mag-send ng warning. So sa madaling salita, hindi ko yun pinara.

Yung sumunod na taxi na hindi ko na matandaan ang pangalan dahil hindi naman masyado kilala saka hindi company owned o kung ano pang tawag dun (hindi ko kasi alam eh), pinara ko na. Pagsakay ko syempre sinabi ko sa driver kung saan ako bababa, "manong Ayala po. Sa may Paseo." Tinanong nya kung saan daw kami dadaan dahil may sunog daw ng mga oras na yun sa may Malibay at masyado daw matrapik kaya hindi daw magandang dumaan dun. Eh di sabi ko sa Buendia na lang dumaan, sa Gil Puyat Ave. Yun lang pati ang alam kong daan bukod sa Edsa. Nagcomment pa si manong na malayo daw dun eh di tanong ako kung may alam pa siya ibang daan. Sabi nya wala. Di sabi ko dun na lang. Sa Roxas Blvd. kami dumaan.

Manong Driver: Lagi ka bang nagta-taxi kapag ganitong oras? Gusto mo abangan na lang kita sa inyo gabi gabi.
Ako: Ay hindi po. Commute po ako lagi. Kaya lang naman ako nag-taxi ngayon eh dahil po late na ko.

Manong Driver: Ah, ganun ba. Kala ko nagtataxi ka lagi eh, aabangan na lang sana kita gabi gabi.
Ako: Ah ganun po ba. Hindi naman po kasi talaga ko nagtataxi eh.

Manong Driver: Talagang ganitong oras ka bumibyahe?
Ako: May pasok po kasi ako.

Manong Driver: Ah ganun ba. Trabaho talaga no. Mabuti ka nga may pinapasukan eh.
Ako: Ganun po talaga. (Hindi ako masyadong magandang kausap pag male-late na ko. Sa relo kasi ako naka-focus)

Hindi ko balak i-share sa manong ang trabaho ko. At sa katunayaan, karamihan ng oras ng byahe, hindi ako nagsasalita. Itong si manong, kung ano ano lang sinasabi. Tumatango lang ako, or ngumingiti. Hindi kasi ako sanay makipag-usap sa stranger. Saka, hindi naman sa nagiging judgemental ako sa itsura ng tao, pero hindi masyadong maganda ang pakiramdam ko sa manong. Ang itsura nya ay mukhang nasa mga mid-30s at mukha syang mamang manginginom, yung pangangatawan nya. Medyo mataba na malaking mama. Basta ganun.

Para naman hindi isipin ng manong na suplada ako at saka dahil nga nase-sense ko na pwedeng gumawa ng hindi maganda ang manong, ako naman ang nakipag-usap. Saka tahimik na kami eh. Nung nasa kahabaan na kami ng Gil Puyat, bago ata dumating ng Mayapis yun, ganito ang naging conversation namin.

Ako: Ganitong oras po ba talaga kayo nagbibiyahe?
Manong Driver: Oo.

Ako: Bakit po?
Manong Driver: Eh kasi malamig. Kapag umaga kasi sobrang init. Saka walang trapik.

Ako: (idadagdag ko na sana ang "hindi po ba delikado?" kaso, may dinugsong pa sya..)
Manong Driver: Saka sa gabi, may holdaper. (mischievous grin)

Tahimik. Tumahimik ako. Nakatingin lang ako sa harap ng sasakyan.

Manong Driver: Madami kasing holdaper pagka gabi.

Tiningnan ko ang manong driver habang nakangiti ako pero actually, may feeling of uneasiness na ko inside. At bakit kaya kailangan pa nyang ulitin yung sinabi nya?

Ako: Madami pong holdaper?
Manong Driver: Oo. (Tinitingnan nya ko tapos nakangiti sya. At yung ngiti nya parang may ibig sabihin)

Ayokong mag-isip ng masama dahil sabi nila, ang negative thoughts ay nakaka-attract din ng negative. So iniisip ko, nagpapatawa lang sya. At dapat, sakyan ko yung joke nya. Madami nang naglalaro sa isip ko nun, pero inaalis ko. Naisip kong isagot eh, "Bakit manong? Nanghoholdap po ba kayo?" Kaso naisip ko, baka sumagot ng oo yung mama (nay kupu! scary!), eh hindi naman magandang biro yun diba, kaya nag-isip ako ng iba. Sa mga oras pa naman na ganun (mag-aalas-12 na) maraming ganun. So ito na lang ang sinagot ko:

Ako: Bakit po? Nagsasakay po ba kayo ng holdaper?
(Naisip ko, may iba ding gumagawa ng ganun, pero wala naman ako naiisip na isasagot nya dun)
Manong Driver:(tamang tawa) Hindi naman. Ayala tayo ano?
Ako: Opo.

Naisip ko, baka nafi-feel nung mama na baka bigla akong bumaba, eh nandun na kami sa may Pasong Tamo, eh may building din kami dun. Iniisip ko kung bababa ako. Siguro nasense nya yung iniisip kong gawin, siguro ni-remind nya ko kung saan ako bababa. So hindi na ko bumaba din. Bukod sa seconds lang ang meron ako para makapag-isip kung bababa ako dun sa may Export Bank, baka isipin ng manong sinasakyan ko ang parang pananakot nya. Or kung joke yun, hindi sya nakakatawa.

Nasa may kanto na kami ng Gil Puyat at Ayala sa may RCBC at naisip kong medyo madilim ang parteng yun. Andami talaga ng tumatakbo sa utak ko, kung ano ang pwedeng mangyari at kung ano ang gagawin ko. Lahat ay nangyayari lang within seconds. At nananalangin na ako. Hindi naman talaga ako natatakot eh dahil pati ayokong makita ng manong na natatakot ako. Eh mas vulnerable ang taong takot pagka ganun. Saka ang taong takot, nawawala sa composure. Kinakabahan. At kapag kinakabahan ka, mas prone sa mistakes. At hindi ka makakapag-isip ng maayos. Nagpe-pray ako dahil ang Lord ang pinaka-sure na pag-asa ko nun. I don't want to doubt dahil para ano pa't humingi ka ng tulong sa Lord kung hindi ka naman maniniwala na gagawin Nya yun, lalo pa sa mga gipit na sitwasyon. So far, hindi pa nagf-fail ang method na ito para sa kin. Mabait ang Lord. Kailangan mo lang maniwala. Have faith. Pinagp-pray ko na sana mali ang iniisip ko at alam kong He will take care of me, thinking of God's promises stated in the Bible. Never will I leave you nor forsake you. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me (Psalms 23:4). Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6,7). At pinagpe-pray ko na alam kong kailangan ng taong yon ang pera pero sana, wag syang gumawa ng masama para lang dun. To bless manong driver and to take care of me.

And thank God! Nothing bad happened!

Nandun na kami sa may tawiran sa may kung tawagin nila ay Herrera at sinabi ko sa manong na dun na lang ako ibaba. Pumatak ang metro ng P95 at binayaran ko ang manong ng P100 at hindi na ko humingi ng sukli, at nag-thank you ako sa manong. Pagbaba ko, parang umatake ang epekto ng kakainom ko ng kape. Slightly jittery ako sa nerbiyos. At thankful ako na walang nangyaring masama sa kin at nakarating ako ng maayos at hindi ako na-late.

Sinasabi ko na nga ba, kaya ayokong mag-taxi eh. Sa susunod, di na ko magpapa-late. Waaah!

Lord, thank you very much po talaga.
posted by goldiqt @ 8:11 AM
(0) blessed me  
About This Blog
I don't intend this to be my life's chronicles but I might write some of my experiences here. Even so, everything that's written in here are either products of my excessive contemplation, or just plainly, pure boredom. In any case, I still try to write as sensible as possible, for what I really intend to do and I hope is achieved in every writing, is to impart or share some of the things I learn and sometimes, some struggles in life. Don't expect all seriousness in everything in here though.

In short, this blog is my outlet. My noted thoughts and reflections.

About Me

Yahoo! Avatars

Name: Goldi

Home: Pasay City, Philippines

Birthday: June 2

Hobbies & Interests: Jesus, music, books, journals, internet, computers, tech stuff, gadgets * sound tripping, singing, playing musical instruments (I know guitar and flute recorder, I just wish I can play them well), watching movie with a tub of popcorn drizzled with melted butter (yum!), reading * observing, pondering, reflecting, learning * laughing or making people laugh (though I'm not good at it) and laugh with them, make people smile, or just listen to their stories. Minsan, trip ko lang din mang-asar =p

About Me: I'm a simple, idealistic but down-to-earth, & friendly person. Quiet most of the time, but friendly enough to have a nice talk (or even a hearty laugh) with anyone. "I myself no longer live, but Christ lives in me. So I live my life in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Galatians 2:20 NLT

Principles I live by:

"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." -Psalm 37:4

"If people talk negatively about you, live in such a way that no one will believe them."

"God is a God of happy endings. If you're not yet happy, it's not yet the end."

"It's not what we know but what we do that counts." -Our Daily Bread

"It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." -Dumbledore, Harry Potter 2

"Girls should assume that until a guy expresses interest, they're just friends." -J. Harris, Boy Meets Girl

"True love doesn't just wait; it plans." -Boy Meets Girl

"Eros will have naked bodies; friendship naked personalities." -C.S. Lewis

"Ideals are like stars; we will not succeed in touching them with our hands but by following them, as the sea faring man in the ocean, we will reach our destiny." -J. Harris, Boy Meets Girl

Food for the Soul
Verse of the Day


Daily Wisdom
SayBox

Currents
Today is...

Time now is...

Manila, Philippines

Previous Posts
Precious Moments
Hand-Formed Pots
Say What? (Guarding Our Tongue)
Love Thoughts
Focus
The Art of Letting Go
On Romantic Relationships
The Difference
Close the Gates
Work Hard
Loving Your Sister
Thank you Lord
Archives
Blogsters

Cool Links
Kamsahamnida!

I've been visited by...
Angels
Thanks for droppin' by.
See you again ^_^.