Life can seem unbearable at times, but don't let it keep you down. Meditate on God's goodness, talk to Him, and know that He hears you. When life knocks you to your knees, you're in a good position to pray.
Sunday, July 23, 2006
Bamboozled
Wow... It'd been a very long time since I've had my last post. I am not really a frequent updater or a regular poster. It shows naman diba? ^_^. Yeah I know reich and din-din.. I've been gone for years (overstatement). This is actually already the "regular" blog update for me. You guys should already get used to it, for if I'm going to blog about the long absence, this would already be a regular introduction everytime I post.
Anyways... there were just things that bothers me these days. I am starting to worry. I am not really a worrier, but it doesn't mean I don't worry at all.
I used to have a regular monitoring of myself.. that is through journals and planners. I keep one notebook for the written, more personal and private thoughts, the blog for the things I want to share, and the planner to keep track of my schedules. Ang dami no? Well, it really helped me a lot, but because my priorities got messed up lately, a lot of the things I have neatly organized before are now a chaos.
I used to be a very busy person, always making plans for what I'm going to do, from the next hour, to next month. That's only the farthest I've gone. I haven't thought of anything I want to happen yet after a year, 2 years, or 5 years. My plans are short termed. It was just like because I have a lot of activities to attend to, like work, friends, ministries, family matters, bills payments, money allocations or budgeting ( I don't have that much money so I have to do this), that I'm making plans. I just do it to get organized, not really to lay out something I'd like to achieve in the future, like setting goals.
I was so contented before, 'cause it was also the time that I am trying to forget someone I have to let go. I managed to get on my life the soonest I can, and I even got involved to more church activities, drawing me closer to God.
I really don't know, 'cause up to now, I am still thinking, what caused me to be like this? All those activities I have before, some have been gone and to some that are still there, I grew cold in doing. I've lost my passion. I even don't have my quiet times or devotions anymore. Is it because I just got tired? Do I just lack motivation? What is it then that made me do those things before, without a single complain and I'm always happy doing it? As other's would say, "nanginginig pa" because I find it ecstatic? Ano?
I really don't understand myself now and this has already been going for several months. The regular quiet time is already a big loss, but I just don't understand myself, why am I not doing anything? Not to mention other things like I'm already left behind when it comes to career movements. A lot of my batchmates, and some of my team mates that came later than me are already climbing up the corporate ladder and look at me? I'm still stuck to where I've been ever since I entered this company. And to think I'm nearing my 3rd anniversary here?
Yeah.. I've thought of those things. I am very aware I am not making any progress, I even got worse in some area. What's happening?
Lord... Please help me.
posted by goldiqt @ 5:56 PM
3 Comment(s):
i can relate to that. i just had the biggest realization of my life when i got sick.
priorities matter, Goldi. Think of what you REALLY wanna do.. do u really wanna be stuck as an agent? do u really wanna get stuck in a call center environment, for that matter?
from there, you'll find ur path. money isn't everything, you know that. there are also more companies out there who can give you more.
anyway, i know in time your realization will come... sana lang, di ka magkasakit gaya ko... hehehe...
By Anonymous, at July 24, 2006 2:29 AM
"I was so contented before, 'cause it was also the time that I am trying to forget someone I have to let go..."
ako naman i'm trying to get over this crazy thing called infatuation. It is indeed like a disease that's slowly killing me. All systems might get affected/infected so I must do something. (Hmm, keep in mind arnold that prevention is better than cure. :bop:)
I don't intend this to be my life's chronicles but I might write some of my experiences here.
Even so, everything that's written in here are either products of my excessive contemplation, or just plainly, pure boredom.
In any case, I still try to write as sensible as possible, for what I really intend to do and I hope is achieved in every writing,
is to impart or share some of the things I learn and sometimes, some struggles in life. Don't expect all seriousness in everything in here though.
In short, this blog is my outlet. My noted thoughts and reflections.
About Me
Name: Goldi
Home: Pasay City, Philippines
Birthday: June 2
Hobbies & Interests: Jesus, music, books, journals, internet, computers, tech stuff, gadgets * sound tripping, singing, playing musical instruments (I know guitar and flute recorder, I just wish I can play them well), watching movie with a tub of popcorn drizzled with melted butter (yum!), reading * observing, pondering, reflecting, learning * laughing or making people laugh (though I'm not good at it) and laugh with them, make people smile, or just listen to their stories. Minsan, trip ko lang din mang-asar =p
About Me: I'm a simple, idealistic but down-to-earth, & friendly person. Quiet most of the time, but friendly enough to have a nice talk (or even a hearty laugh) with anyone. "I myself no longer live, but Christ lives in me. So I live my life in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Galatians 2:20 NLT
Principles I live by:
"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." -Psalm 37:4
"If people talk negatively about you, live in such a way that no one will believe them."
"God is a God of happy endings. If you're not yet happy, it's not yet the end."
"It's not what we know but what we do that counts." -Our Daily Bread
"It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." -Dumbledore, Harry Potter 2
"Girls should assume that until a guy expresses interest, they're just friends." -J. Harris, Boy Meets Girl
"True love doesn't just wait; it plans." -Boy Meets Girl
"Eros will have naked bodies; friendship naked personalities." -C.S. Lewis
"Ideals are like stars; we will not succeed in touching them with our hands but by following them, as the sea faring man in the ocean, we will reach our destiny." -J. Harris, Boy Meets Girl
Wow... It'd been a very long time since I've had my last post. I am not really a frequent updater or a regular poster. It shows naman diba? ^_^. Yeah I know reich and din-din.. I've been gone for years (overstatement). This is actually already the "regular" blog update for me. You guys should already get used to it, for if I'm going to blog about the long absence, this would already be a regular introduction everytime I post.
3 Comment(s):
i can relate to that. i just had the biggest realization of my life when i got sick.
priorities matter, Goldi. Think of what you REALLY wanna do.. do u really wanna be stuck as an agent? do u really wanna get stuck in a call center environment, for that matter?
from there, you'll find ur path. money isn't everything, you know that. there are also more companies out there who can give you more.
anyway, i know in time your realization will come... sana lang, di ka magkasakit gaya ko... hehehe...
"I was so contented before, 'cause it was also the time that I am trying to forget someone I have to let go..."
ako naman i'm trying to get over this crazy thing called infatuation. It is indeed like a disease that's slowly killing me. All systems might get affected/infected so I must do something. (Hmm, keep in mind arnold that prevention is better than cure. :bop:)
maybe.. and just maybe... it's a phase or something.. you'll get through it..
"Monotony is the awful reward of the careful."
or maybe, you just need something new in your life.. you probably got tired or want something better...
I, honestly have no idea.. 'cause if i did, then we wouldn't be on the same boat.
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